You don't need to invoke anyone's prehistoric sky god if that's your objection. You only need to go down to a boring secular in CA anyway government office, fill out some paperwork, and make some promises that you've been living up to for a decade anyway. Plus side: a whole shitload of state and federal rights and legal protections.
Downside: possibly marginally higher taxes if you are both high earners. Marriage isn't going to make an unhappy individual happy. My use of the word "cozy" was intentional, because you just can't take the statistics and assume they will be true for you. This applies to a person and your particular feelings toward her, so how can it not be emotional?
Anyway, I gave ya both - statistics and my emotional reaction. I couldn't help it. But I do have more facts for you and I use the term facts loosely. Here is one that states unmarried cohabitations overall are less stable than marriages , and then it goes into probability of divorce based on specific situations, which is also interesting, but perhaps not exactly what you were looking for. Thumbs up for what smalls says. Cohabitation, marital quality and resistance to reason is what comes to my mind I have a big collection of more scholarly grounded articles, but this blog entry is memorable Advice, especially coming from parents generation, to not get married is very ill informed.
The reason for it is that first sociological research results on marriage vs. Benefits of cohabitation will one day be commonly known as the false logic of the previous century. But we are not there yet.
About Ilona Bray
Yet for anything that matters for the OP OP: the information you are looking for has high probability of being irrelevant to you. As a couple, you entered the dynamics of cohabitation so long ago that regaining dynamics of a married relationship is hard, if at all possible. I wish your family well. Thank you, everybody, for your input and links.
I know how I feel about this, and I'd appreciate it if feelings were left out of the equation. Let me decide what is relevant and irrelevant. I've asked for data, studies, and statistics. Opinions hold very little interest for me on this issue.
How Living Together Before Marriage Impacts Your Finances
You should make sure you have legal structures in place regarding your child. Specifically, a will. You should consider health care power of attorney. All the things gay people have had to do to have the same rights as married people. You should consider tax and financial implications. You may be benefiting on taxes, and, at some point, financial aid. The writers also run the Alternatives to Marriage Project , which may have some of the data or pointers to the data that you're looking for.
They have a page devoted to statistics. Oh, also? If you are considering Domestic Partnership rather than marriage, in CA it is limited to opposite sex partnerships of those 62 and older only.
- A Happy Marriage.
- Next Generation Sequencing and Whole Genome Selection in Aquaculture.
- Fated - A Doomsday Brethren novella (Doomsday Brethren Series);
- The Principles of Disruptive Design.
- El Lupus Eritematoso Sistémico, es un cuento (Enfermería nº 1) (Spanish Edition).
- The Essential Louise Hay Collection.
That plus the exclusion of common-law marriage makes it seems like there aren't very many options in CA for heterosexual couples who don't wish to marry. You may also want to consider the estate and intestacy issues that relate to the status of being legally married vs. I would speak to an attorney about the legal issues surrounding your choice, esp.
You've done the hard part - fostering a successful relationship and family life. The trappings of marriage are the bonus round for someone in your situation. I'd just go ahead and jump through the hoop. This toes the line of hard facts vs. Adults whose own parents divorced are much more likely to choose cohabitation over marriage.
This fact has been, perhaps wrongly, interpreted. Some researchers and therapists imply that the propensity to "marital failures" has been passed down to the current generation, as if divorce is a genetic illness or environmental toxin. Fortunately, the influence of a parental divorce on the later cohabitation of their children decreases as the parents' age at divorce increases.
It is not always recognized, but divorce commonly produces a decline in the socioeconomic status of one of the partners, usually the wife. Alimony is rare and, if awarded, rarely paid.
Sharing a Small Space With Someone Else? Here’s How to Keep the Peace
Perhaps especially vexing is the fact that children are victimized. Typically, children of divorce are less well supported than children of intact families. In addition, they do not develop as well psychologically or achieve as much educationally. They are usually less happy and well adjusted than other children, and our schools are overburdened dealing with their problems.
For some, cohabitation may be an effort to avoid the problems caused by divorce. It is now a leading family values issue, as well it should be. The disposition to avoid divorce is often strong among people who witnessed their parents' divorce. Nevertheless, children often suffer more when one member of the cohabiting unit is not the biological parent. To be clear, this went on for fifty years. Innocent indeed As of , they still haven't done it despite being married.
Miki and Yuu in Marmalade Boy , with the ever odder situation that their parents are all living in the same household—with Miki's mother married to Yuu's father, and Miki's father married to Yuu's mother. Miki is highly embarrassed, of course, but eventually falls in love with her double step-brother. Played with in Ayakashi Ayashi. Both the young painter Kyousai and Atoru, the girl he's infatuated with, take up residence in a geisha house.
The both of them hang out with each other in the house and around town a lot. Nothing untoward happens, but Kyousai clearly wouldn't mind if the cohabitation was less than innocent.
Cohabit - Idioms by The Free Dictionary
Bonus points in that the geisha house is also home to oiran, high-class courtesans, which means that less than innocent activities do happen in their cohabitation—but not ones performed by them. Since Detective Conan is in the body of a six-year-old, any romantic relationship with his actually-of-equal-age Love Interest is out of the question. She, for her part, is genuinely interested in Shinichi but regards Conan as a surrogate little brother.
Things get awkward for Conan when the two do things like talk about Shinichi or share a bath together. Joshua and Fiore of Chrono Crusade are staying in what's noted as Aion's house, but since he's often away on business they seem to spend several months living together without anything happening. But not if Fan Fic has anything to say about it. Considering that Fiore is an Emotionless Girl who's more concerned with trying to serve Joshua than date him, and Joshua is a creepily innocent teenager that usually isn't all there , it's not that far-fetched to think that it never occurred to either of them to do anything.
While not exactly cohabitation, Taiga's constant visits to Ryuuji's house for dinner right from the start of Toradora!
Taiga immediately dispels the rumors but continues to go over to Ryuuji's anyway because she's completely terrible at doing chores and incapable of sole habitation. She starts spending more time at his house as the series progresses though. Ikuto and Suzu in Nagasarete Airantou live together and sleep in futons right next to each other. An interesting variation in that the guy is the Pretty Freeloader. Nothing happens between them because Ikuto is a Celibate Hero , although seeing as Suzu is an Innocent Fanservice Girl we get many moments of Please Put Some Clothes On and she really wants to bathe with him, but not for sexual reasons, like most of the girls she probably does not know what sex is, she just wants to bathe with him for company.
Another interesting subversion is that everyone knows that they are not doing anything. Some are in fact angry about it. In DearS , when Mitsuka-sensei finds out that Takeya and Ren live together, her perverted mind takes it to the extreme and she starts imagining that they live together as lovers. Takeya insists on denying this since they really do only live together.
A third has a magic portal from her apartment to his bedroom, and a fourth lives next door.